The Happiness Pearl

When we think of happiness, more often than not we expect that some kind of change is required to make us happy. A new career, a new life partner, a child, more money, a new home, a new outfit, perhaps even a vacation or new friends.

Most of us equate happiness to something. How many of us can pinpoint the last time we were happy and not relate it to something or someone, and for that matter we appear to relate the something when think about unhappiness.

We never take responsibility ourselves for happiness, good or bad. The blame and responsibility is left squarely on the shoulders of something else - why ?

The truth is that true happiness is within ourselves. How we get there and how we achieve that is by doing more of what makes us happy. These are actions not purchases. Not filling or lives with more clutter. What is it in our lives that fills us with Joy?

Realizing that the little things really are the important things is one way to be filled with joy and happiness. Happiness can not be bought. This is a fact. If it were not so , lottery winners would be eternally happy. You don't have to go far to discover how many lottery winners are more unhappy after their win than they ever were before it. Inherited millionaires- they too were not brought happiness by their inherited fortunes, of course we can all dream and fantasize about what we would do if we won copious amounts of money- but then what ?

Guaranteed without a doubt money does not equal happiness so what does ?

Relationships? Does another person in our lives bring us happiness? I'm not an expert in relationships but I would say in my experience , no. If we are a good match, a kindred spirit then the reality is that potentially another person can add to our happiness, but we must find happiness from within first, we must be the foundation of our own happiness, long before we add a life partner to that equation. Once again this becomes a space where we blame and look for reasons as to why we are unhappy. A life partner is an easy target to pin blame on for that.

What if happiness is a life goal? What if our search for happiness leads us to procure all of these symbols of status? Do we want to be happy for ourselves or is it merely a reason to show the world that we are successful?

Social media is full of status and profile pages telling the world how wonderful our lives are, how happy we are, how many friends we have, how much we earn and how much we spend, is this true happiness? Of course not.

True happiness is an act. An act of doing something that makes us feel happy. Only you know what this is for you, it must be an act that is for you , not an act that is trending, not the latest big thing unless that is truly what makes you happy. Happiness is, filling our lives over and over with the one thing that fulfills you.

If you are not happy today, writing you a cheque for £1 000,000 will not change that.

If you are not happy today, introducing you to the love of your life will not change that.

If you are not happy today, positive thinking will not change that.

If you are not happy today, a blank credit card to spend on whatever you want will not change that.

All of the above may be short term fixes, but eventually that deep well within you will be empty again. We must look deep within ourselves to find our own unique happiness. The happiness that even when life throws us a challenge, which it will, our happiness can not be lost. Life is not easy, it is not supposed to be. We have opportunities to learn, grow and to achieve, to push boundaries and to find new things to enrich our happiness, to thrive on, to be ourselves, please don't wast these opportunities.

xxLei

NOBODY CAN MAKE YOU HAPPY UNTIL YOU'RE HAPPY WITH YOURSLEF FIRST.