Why we should all take personal responsibility- women who work in male dominated industries

I had an interaction with a young woman this week. I won't pretend it was pleasurable. More confrontational. She called me rude... shock... horror. Imagine, Moi ... rude. How horrific. Only after the conversation did I stop to think how I had responded to her. Am I rude? I thought that I was being helpful, and showing her a different perspective. Then guilt settled in and I felt hurt. My words had been taken so out of context. This young woman listened but heard nothing I said.

It suddenly occurred to me that the lessons we are teaching our younger generations are totally wrong. Prevention of discipline, political correctness and the rights of employees are creating an impossible workplace. Employers have minimal rights and are being left wide open to legal battles all in the name of discrimination.

It seems to me that it is high time as parents and employers that we teach our young people about respect, discipline and workplace etiquette. A job is a privilege not an entitlement. Employers spend a lot of time, resources and finance training and educating staff, adding to their skills and knowledge, of course this is to benefit their own business, but each employee can walk away with those skills and the employer has to begin again.

I have been on both sides of this fence, employee and employer. I have worked in male dominated industry for most of my life. I am fully aware of how the dinosaurs see women as an obstacle that is taking over their territory. I know how it is to have clients refuse to talk to me even though I am the business owner. I know how it feels to be questioned on the technicalities on particular projects that no man would be questioned on just to prove a point.

As women in male dominated industry, we must be smarter , we must be more efficient, we must be more precise than all of our male co- workers. We must excel, simply because we are women. There are many cases where men do not want us working beside them, they feel threatened by us. For no other reason than we are women and they don't know how to react when we are around them in their space. We are in their man cave if you like, so we have to grow a tougher skin to be accepted. We must love this career if we have chosen this path. Male dominated industry for women is not for the faint hearted. It takes every ounce of energy to be mentally prepared for such a career. That being said it is possible to have a fulfilling career in this industry.

I think we have to be fully aware of what we are letting ourselves in for. To be prepared for bigger challenges that we have ever faced. But we must also realise that even though we may think we are doing a sterling job or that we are better than our male counterparts that does not necessarily mean that our superiors think that we are awesome.

No matter what the career or job is that we choose, we must go out of our way everyday and give 110%, love what we do even when we don't. Push our own boundaries. Excel, be all that we can possibly be and then push forward a little further. If the job you are in does not align with your own values, if you think you are not being valued, of course speak to your supervisor/manager/ ceo who ever is necessary. If this is not successful, I'd look for another job, I feel like it is time that we all took responsibility for ourselves, the era of blame should be over.

It can not be easy to be overlooked or to feel your complaint is not being taken seriously, for me I feel like that says a lot more about them than me. I have freedom, I have choice, I take responsibility for me so in such a situation I would look for another employer who respects me, my work and my values . It's my responsibility to take care of me. Perhaps we all need to take the responsibility to take care of ourselves.

xx Lei

YOU MUST TAKE PERSONAL RESPONSIBILITY. YOU CANNOT CHANGE THE CIRCUMSTANCES, THE SEASONS, OR THE WIND, BUT YOU CAN CHANGE YOURSELF. THAT IS SOMETHING YOU HAVE CHARGE OF . - Jim Rohn